“You don’t really know someone until you travel with them” - they say
Travelling reveals our true selves, one minute we’re in pure bliss, the next severe distress. Travelling with someone is when your tolerance threshold levels are truly pushed and tested to the brink. So, it’s important to choose who you travel with wisely. We all know that travelling with the high maintenance friend, the cheap friend, the sloppy drunk friend and the taken friend are probably not the best travel buddy decisions to make. But what about the the “guy friend”?
At first it seems pretty ideal, fun and low maintenance. Having a dude around seems safer, there are less chances of getting gang raped right? Oh and y'all can wing man each other.
It seems, guys are using this "let's travel together" strategy to get laid. This is some modern day “get laid tactic” which is actually quite genius if you think about it. The set up is perfect - in their mind, why wouldn’t you want to have crazy no strings attached sex in beautiful places you’ve never been to? Meanwhile you see it as a travel opportunity. They just don’t get it.
Here is your travelling with “guy friend” survival guide and reasons why you probably shouldn’t.
1.)Don’t Go
If I can give you one piece of advice, it is just don’t do it. Opposite-sex friendships just don’t exist. They’re a sham. Guaranteed, his expectations are much different to yours. Don’t go travelling with your “guy friend” because there is no such thing as “just a guy friend”.
2.) Don’t have drunk sex
If you’ve already booked a holiday with your “guy friend” and it’s too late to not go. The second most important rule here is - do not have drunk sex. Avoid alcohol altogether even if you have to. Having sex, pretty much paves out an expectation of sex every day and night for the rest of the trip in their mind.
3.) Don’t look so hot
Any effort you make in your appearance he’ll automatically presume you’re doing it for him. Make yourself as unattractive as possible.
4.) Do friend-zone
Do a lot of it. Guys are really bad at reading people and situations. Family-zone him if you have to. Tell him you have feelings for random people. Literally spell it out to them.
5.) Don’t agree to share a room or bed
Platonic bed sharing does not exist with opposite sex friendships. It’s a ploy. Don’t fall for it.
6.) Tinder
Utilise tinder to meet new people. Some countries have some pretty fine tinder talent. Tell him you’re meeting up with tinder people. Be safe and smart, meet in a public place always.
7.) Do your own thing
Don’t sit around and sulk, take some time away from your guy friends’ weird advances and go explore. You’ll be surprised at who you meet.
8.) Bounce
If things become unbearably awkward or nasty. Then bounce. Travel alone or get together with other solo travellers.
No matter what comes out of the situation, always remember you have options and it doesn’t have to ruin your trip. Also remember it’s not your fault that people want to fuck you. Stay true to yourself. Don’t sleep with your guy friend out of pity, obligation or boredom, and if you have drunk sex accidentally, follow above steps and tell him you blacked out.
As Ernest Hemmingway once said - never go on trips with anyone you do not love.